Monday Morning Meditation #32: Multiplication, God's Way

This week I moved from I Kings to II Kings and wandered into the story of Elisha coming to Gilgal when there was a famine in the land. To a gathering of 100 men with Elisha, a man from Baal-shalishah brought Elisha 20 loaves of barley and fresh ears of corn, who told his servant to give them to the 100 men. The servant asked how on earth these few loaves would feed 100 people, and Elisha responded, "Give the people, that they may eat; for thus saith the LORD: They shall eat, and shall leave thereof." And that is exactly what happened. In a foreshadowing of the story of Jesus feeding the multitudes with five fishes and two loaves and having baskets left over, not only were the people fed, but also there was leftover.

Reading: II Kings 4: 38-44
Meditation: Whenever I hear these stories of God multiplying resources, whether it be loaves of bread or, as earlier in Kings, vessels of oil, I am reminded of so many times when God has has multiplied resources in order to help me and my family, for which I feel immense gratitude. We may live in an imperfect world, in which free will, running rampant, can result in some very bad things happening -- and then watching God bring good out of the bad is highly reassuring. Experiencing the multiplication of resources is about as awe-inspiring as it gets. Since the morning is very early and I do need to get some sleep before heading out to work, I will give only one example, but it is, for me, a powerful one and a bit complex.

After returning to California from Jordan a few years ago, we received an e-note from our tax accountant, informing us that the IRS determined that we had underpaid our taxes by $11,000, based on income from Jordan that we had not thought was taxable but was. The very next day a bill from the IRS stood proudly in our mailbox. "Due immediately" was stamped across it.

Ha! Fat chance in ___! We had just finished moving, and while the majority of our moving expenses had been covered by my new employer, many unanticipated expenses had not been covered. To complicate matters, we had moved all our savings from our bank in Jordan to Shane’s account in the United States to facilitate our return. Our safety valve of $14,000 had us resting easy until the greedy hand of a hospital accountant, unbeknownst to all of us, requested court permission to search Shane’s bank accounts for additional money in order to increase the rate at which he was paying off the costs of the five kidney surgeries of Nathaniel, our grandson. Lo and behold, during the exact two-month period that we were using Shane’s account to hold the money until I was back in the United States and could transfer the money to my own account, the additional $14,000 was found in Shane’s account and without any notice to him, our entire savings at that time was withdrawn by the hospital. All our income had dissipated or been used to cover moving expenses. Now, Uncle Sam wanted $11,000!

Our tax accountant was able to get us a six-week delay, no more. Six weeks to find a spare $11,000 while finishing moving from overseas back to the United States and trying to set up housekeeping, a major one-time expense in itself, turned out to be too great a task for my overwhelmed brain. So, I did what I always do now. I left it up to God. My trust was so complete that I asked only once. Then I put the problem out of my mind, continuing on happily with my daily life, confident that some unique response would come before the end of the six-week period as it always had. It did.

A few days after asking God for help, I received a letter in the mail from Indiana University, where I had worked five years earlier in an interim position. The letter in my hand concerned my retirement fund. I had such a small retirement fund with the university that I had actually forgotten about it. Fortunately, the university had not. According to the letter, all individuals no longer on payroll needed either to take out the retirement funds or roll them over into a retirement fund external to the university immediately. I called the fund, and the amount available for take-out, minus (of course) taxes, gave me 50% of what I needed for the IRS. God had rescued me yet one more time.

The other 50% owed, I was certain, would show up before the end of the six-week period. God had never before left me hanging at half-mast. Sure enough, a week later, a quarterly summary from another retirement fund at another institution, where I worked years earlier, arrived in the mail. I had put that particular fund out of mind because it had taken a big loss years ago. According to the recent statement, though, it still had most of the dollars that had been invested from my pay checks tucked away in it, earning a penny here and there in interest. Those dollars would cover another 40% of what was owed. I called the fund. A very kind gentleman agreed to close my account and send me those much-needed dollars. He could not give me a precise amount but thought it would be close to the amount in the current quarterly summary that I had received in the mail. He explained that I would have to wait for the stock market results at the end of the day, which would determine the precise amount to be disbursed. I would receive whatever the fund was worth at that time, most likely the amount he had just cited to me.

We were close! Clearly, we would not be trapped in IRS hell or married to the IRS for eternity. The remaining 10% would show up somehow. If necessary, I could eke it out of my salary or borrow it from someone.

As it turned out, there was no need to worry about the remaining 10%. The stock market leaped upward over the next few hours. Donnie said he thought it might have been due to the release of iPods on that day —- some of our stock was in technology.

On January 11, we received considerably more than we expected. The amount allowed us to pay off the IRS debt in full on the 12th, the last day of our extension. It also paid our tax accountant’s bill in full. Moreover, after paying all those with their hand held out, we found an additional $400 in our basket. What to do with that? The answer was obvious. That was God’s money. He had over-multiplied our resources, so I compelled to return it to God. (I gave it to Fr. Barry, the director of our local Franciscan retreat center; he was probably amused when I explained that the source of the money was a mathematical miscalculation by God. Actually, I don't think there was any miscalculation; the retreat center really needed that money because their main building had burned down and needed to be re-built.)

And that is far as I can go with you this Monday morning. I retire to prayer, to thank God for the ongoing ways in which He keeps my bread basket full just when they are beginning to look empty, to ask Him to help all others who have empty or emptying bread baskets, and to praise Him for that fact that He really can do this, while still allowing free will to reign. After that, I will spend as much time as I can in contemplation, my favorite part of the day, letting God take over the direction in which my relationship with Him moves.

I will now leave you to your prayer and contemplation, but first, I would like to bring to your attention a Monday morning prayer post that you might enjoy:

Fr. Austin Fleming, priest of the Archdiocese of Boston and pastor in Concord, Massachusetts, posts a prayer each Monday morning that he calls "Monday Morning Offering." I enjoy his prayers very much. I hope you also will find them inspirational. He has graciously given me permission to include a link to his blog on my Monday Morning Meditation posts.

For additional inspiration throughout the week, I would point out two sets of blogs: (1) the list of devotional blogs that follow the enumeration of Monday Morning Meditations on the sidebar of this blog and (2) my blogroll, where I am following a number of inspirational priests and writers about spiritual matters. I learn so very much from all these people. I highly recommend them to you.

Monday Morning Meditation #31: Do Not Cause My People to Sin

This Monday is beginning a bit ineptly. I wanted to get up early; I overslept a little -- not enough to miss out on my prater time but enough perhaps to run out of time to share it with you. I had two loads of laundry to run through before going to work; only one load will make it. (So, do I wear clean underwear and inappropriate clothes, or the other unthinkable combination? I chose the clean underwear -- even though no one sees it!) Fortunately, no need to think about breakfast; my current diet allows only cereal and milk, quick enough to gulp down in five minutes. Donnie casually asked what time I am leaving for Hawaii tomorrow; dunno. I also don't know yet which airline or airport. Will figure that out today. And, the thought is nagging at the back of my mind that my friend, whom my boss forced me to take as a junior manager and who failed as such, never got fully fired on Friday because she ran off on sick leave, then appeared at my boss's office on another issue. I have not been able to reach him to find out if he told her she is being fired by her current supervisor, a senior manager who works for me and with whose decision I concur, from her current position in my organization (he has to help find another position for her -- I looked for something as well).

In any event, I did not have to read far to find something that really struck me today. In the very next chapter, in the very next verse, actually, I came across the story of Baasa, who caused Israel to sin and ignited the ire of God, who smote him, wiping out him, his whole family, any progeny, and all his potential glory as a ruler. Goodness gracious, these Old Testament stories hit home for me!

Reading: I Kings 16: 1-20

Meditation: The story of Baasa opened old sorrows for me. When I first came to faith (at a very late date, I might add), one of the things that I realized with a good deal of sadness was the number of people I had led away from God. Had it been only my family that would have been sad enough, but I had always held leadership positions and had always been outspoken in my atheism. Never pushy, but open about my opinions on just about anything, including what I considered to be an accurate understanding of the non-existence of God. This really confused Americans I had brought to Jordan to teach at a university there. Overwhelmed by the great differences between American and Jordanian life styles, the bridge between which I tried to be for them, they would turn to me for all kinds of physical and emotional help. I earned the title, "God's agent in Jordan." When they found out I was an atheist, they were lost as to what was going on. Only one persevered in not accepting my atheism. He called me "a believer in waiting." Still, as a senior leader in several different positions, working literally on a global scale, I had the opportunity to influence the thinking of many people. Especially younger ones took me on as a role model in far too many cases, a role model that included giving up their faith and accepting my atheist ways. (I was not immoral or unethical -- Donnie says I was "brutally ethical" -- but all decisions were made based on secular ethical systems, not on any thought of God or God's will.)

After coming to faith, I was immensely remorseful for "stealing" people's faith from them. I know God has forgiven me. I know that strong faith won't bend to atheism. I know that God will make right what I put wrong. Still, the remorse is there. Most days now I don't think about it because it is in the past, and it is in God's hands. However, when I read stories like these from the Old Testament, I cannot feel good about who I was. I can only feel grateful for God's grace in the matter.

And that is far as I can go with you this Monday morning. I must run to work, already having finished my prayers for this morning, which I did before retiring, instead of after, today because of the limited time available (and look h ow good God is -- I did finish writing before having to leave for work!). A brief description of the non-private contents of those prayers: I asked, no begged, God to let me help Him put right what I put wrong, something I often do; repented -- oh, how often and sincerely I do! -- for those times in the past that I cannot go back and re-live and did so much harm to so many people; thanked God for those times in which I have been allowed to meet individuals who have re-found their faith after my devastating earlier negative influences on them; and gave praise for the wonderful grace that forgives and forgives and loves and loves. After that, I spent an all-too-brief time in contemplation, my favorite part of the day, letting God take over the direction in which my relationship with Him moves.

I will now leave you to your prayer and contemplation, but first, I would like to bring to your attention a Monday morning prayer post that you might enjoy:

Fr. Austin Fleming, priest of the Archdiocese of Boston and pastor in Concord, Massachusetts, posts a prayer each Monday morning that he calls "Monday Morning Offering." I enjoy his prayers very much. I hope you also will find them inspirational. He has graciously given me permission to include a link to his blog on my Monday Morning Meditation posts.

For additional inspiration throughout the week, I would point out two sets of blogs: (1) the list of devotional blogs that follow the enumeration of Monday Morning Meditations on the sidebar of this blog and (2) my blogroll, where I am following a number of inspirational priests and writers about spiritual matters. I learn so very much from all these people. I highly recommend them to you.

Monday Morning Meditation #30: Lead As Jesus Would

As I read about the successors to Solomon in the middle chapters of the book of I Kings, a clear pattern emerged: not only did these kings sin, but they also caused Israel to sin, much in the manner of Solomon sinning and causing Israel to sin at the end of his life, an act that caused God to be angry with him. With Solomon, it began (in earlier chapters of I Kings) with Solomon's taking of foreign wives against the commandment of God, a command with which God had sought to prevent Solomon being converted to foreign gods through the love of foreign wives and concubines.

Reading: I Kings 15: 33-34
Meditation: It may seem like a bit of a stretch to apply this history to modern leadership, but since modern leadership is the stuff of my every day life, I do see parallels and lessons nearly everywhere, including in I Kings. As was written about Baasa, he "did that which was evil in the sight of the LORD, and walked in the way of Jeroboam, and in his sin wherewith he made Israel to sin," so can it be that leaders of all sorts do evil in the sight of the Lord and in their sin make their followers to sin.

As a senior leader, it is easy to forget the influence that one has over the thinking and beliefs of one's subordinates. More than one display of anger, and some junior leaders will consider that heavy-handed approaches are permissible ways to manage. After all, it is easier to demand and to be angry when one's demands are not met than to share governance, listen patiently to someone you just know is wrong, and to compromise when you just know you are right. A lax interpretation of rules and regulations for self benefit tells both junior leaders and employees that cheating is okay if it is only "a little thing." Remembering that deeds speak louder than words can keep one from self-exemption in acting in accordance with moral and ethical standards especially when one thinks one is not being seen. It is much like with our children. If our words and deeds do not match, our children are more likely to emulate what we do than to follow the principles we hope to inculcate in them through education.

It is far easier than we think to lead those who follow us astray, whether that be astray from moral standards, scrupulous adherence to regulations, or willing obedience of God's commands and taskings. For that reason, I ask God to help me at the beginning of every day (often several times during the day as events unfold) to keep me not only from hurting anyone but also from leading anyone astray. I also ask that His love flow through me and splash onto those around me, that both my words and deeds honor Him, and that I set the kind of example for junior leaders and employees that He would have me set. (Of course, even with God's help, I do not always succeed for human emotions intervene from time to time, causing me to forget to refer the given situation back to God.)

In trying to lead as God would have me lead, I find two sources of leadership development helpful. One is the Bible. Just as the passage from I Kings can provide excellent guidance, so can much throughout the Bible -- those situations where leaders excelled and those where they failed. There is another book that I have found to be quite helpful and that I recommend to any leader: Jesus on Leadership (C. Gene Wilkes). For leaders who are not Christians, a very similar book is put out by the Greenleaf Center, The Case for Servant Leadership (Kent Keith, the author of the Paradoxical Commandments that Mother Theresa loved, otherwise known as "Do It Anyway"); while foot-washing is not mentioned in it, it does reflect principles that God taught to leaders and hoped and expected from them throughout the Bible.

These books help me a lot. God (and prayer) help me even more. And the rest I mess up all by myself -- and go running to God to help me fix it!

And that is far as I can go with you this Monday morning. I must retire to prayer to continue to ask for guidance every minute of every day as I interact with junior leaders and rank-and-file employees, to repent for those times that I have set a bad example, to thank God for so often setting straight with my employees what I do wrong, and to give praise for the way in which He leads me and my subordinate leaders to assist and support those who work for us, the ways in which he ensures that we do not harm any of them exceedingly much, and the way in which He has brought much spirituality into our workplace. After that, I will spend time in contemplation, my favorite part of the day, letting God take over the direction in which my relationship with Him moves.

I will now leave you to your prayer and contemplation, but first, I would like to bring to your attention a Monday morning prayer post that you might enjoy:

Fr. Austin Fleming, priest of the Archdiocese of Boston and pastor in Concord, Massachusetts, posts a prayer each Monday morning that he calls "Monday Morning Offering." I enjoy his prayers very much. I hope you also will find them inspirational. He has graciously given me permission to include a link to his blog on my Monday Morning Meditation posts.

For additional inspiration throughout the week, I would point out two sets of blogs: (1) the list of devotional blogs that follow the enumeration of Monday Morning Meditations on the sidebar of this blog and (2) my blogroll, where I am following a number of inspirational priests and writers about spiritual matters. I learn so very much from all these people. I highly recommend them to you.

Monday Morning Meditation #29: Let Me Discern Between Good and Evil

As I moved on into the book of I Kings, David's long reign came to an end and Solomon was annointed king after a failed attempt by Adonijah to appoint himself king. Shortly after becoming king, Solomon had a dream in which God asked him how could he gift him, to which Solomon replied, "Give Thy servant an understanding heart to judge Thy people, that I may discern between good and evil," whence came what we speak of today as Solomon's great wisdom.

Reading: I Kings 3:19

Meditation: Discernment between good and evil -- what a great gift! And to have the wisdom to think to ask for that instead of something more evanescent or of lesser ultimate value! Solomon did indeed choose well. May we all, if ever given the chance, choose as well.

I suppose that this particular action/verse stopped me in my tracks because this is been a topic that has had me in its grip in recent days. I posted yesterday on Modern Mysticism about nightmares and the visitation by evil forces while asleep at a time when I did not want to believe that Evil, as such, could really exist. I have also posted earlier on Blest Atheist about some unnerving experiences that seemed to be Evil up to no good.

At times, I find it very difficult to discern between Good and Evil. Perhaps this is because I expect to find only Good. (Yes, I am naive in that way.) Perhaps it is because I expect God to protect me from all Evil. (I suppose I am naive in that way, too, although God has never failed to rescue me.) Perhaps Evil can be so enticingly sweet at times that I simply do not want to believe that it is really Evil. (Yes, triply naive, I admit it.)

A couple of years ago, a friend told me that he was being chased by Evil. I remember how scary that was. I remember how much time we spent in prayer together. I also remember how much time I spent in prayer alone, dedicated to begging God to deliver my friend from evil: 20 hours! In the end, Evil lost and God won. It was, however, a battle. I guess that this is what we are being told over and over again in the Bible: there is a battle between Good and Evil, and we are often part of it.

Most recently, an acquaintance with whom I am required to interact at times seems to be caught in a battle between Good and Evil over him, but he does not seem to recognize it. I have pointed it out, and I have seen his face take on strange castings, so strange that I am relieved that I have never had to be alone with him at these moments. I am not the only one who has noticed these facial disturbances and a sense of evil, not emanating from within him but present all around him. He is a believer and professes belief, but sometimes the words sound hollow and his eyes look vacant. I don't know how to help or whether I should help or even if I have properly discerned evil in this case. I may be completely wrong. So, I pray for him. And I pray for me -- for the kind of discernment that God gave to Solomon (even for a small part of it).

And that is far as I can go with you this Monday morning. I must retire to prayer to continue to ask again for greater discernment, to repent for those times that I have mistaken Evil for Good, to thank God for protecting me from evil when I was too naive to know that I was surrounded by it, and to give praise for the way in which He leads me to safety even when I do not know where I am going except that I am following Him. After that, I will spend time in contemplation, my favorite part of the day, letting God take over the direction in which my relationship with Him moves.

I will now leave you to your prayer and contemplation, but first, I would like to bring to your attention a Monday morning prayer post that you might enjoy:

Fr. Austin Fleming, priest of the Archdiocese of Boston and pastor in Concord, Massachusetts, posts a prayer each Monday morning that he calls "Monday Morning Offering." I enjoy his prayers very much. I hope you also will find them inspirational. He has graciously given me permission to include a link to his blog on my Monday Morning Meditation posts.

For additional inspiration throughout the week, I would point out two sets of blogs: (1) the list of devotional blogs that follow the enumeration of Monday Morning Meditations on the sidebar of this blog and (2) my blogroll, where I am following a number of inspirational priests and writers about spiritual matters. I learn so very much from all these people. I highly recommend them to you.

Monday Morning Meditation #61: I Lift Up My Eyes unto the Hills

When I reached Psalm 121 this week, it was clear what this Monday morning's meditation would be about for I had just come across one of my two favorite psalms (the other being Psalm 23, which I think is a favorite for many people). Raised in the foothills of the White Mountains in Maine and New Hampshire, spending the first years of married life in the Bitteroot Mountains of Montana, working recently for two blessed years in the holy hills of Jordan (in the shadow of Mount Nebo), and now sheltered in my current residence by the California coastal mountains, I find hills of any sort to be as essential to my being as the Swiss Alps were to Heidi's of literary fame. The psalm evokes the sense of security, safety, and peace that I feel in the mountains.

Reading: Psalm 121

Meditation: San Ignatio is surrounded by hills, gentle slopes that rise enough into the sky to be considered small mountains but not great summits. As such, they exude an atmosphere of friendliness, like the hand of God reaching out to say, "Here I am; come nearer." I see these hills every day. In the winter and spring, when they are sprinkled with raindrops, they are great folds of green carpets rising toward the sun. When the rain has sunk below the roots of the grass, they become the golden hills of our summer and fall. Whether they are green or gold, I can look upon them and know that my help comes from just beyond them, from God, who pours out love with the sunshine and with the rain. When I take my constitution, lately less daily than it should be, I often find myself reciting Psalm 121, as I look upon the hills.

Here, indeed, I find my help. Here, too, I find that God never sleeps. The sun by day and the moon by night in our clear sky remind me of God's presence, love, and kindness. Here I feel secure.

A few years ago, when I was leaving RCIA, Fr. Greg stood at the door as I was leaving, as if waiting. When I asked what he was waiting for, he said he was watching me go to me car. "Well," I told him, "I hope you have extraordinary distance vision because I walked."

"In that case," he responded, "be careful that you are not attacked on your way back."

Now why he would ever think that anything like that would happen in San Ignatio, I don't know, but then he was in interim priest and did not live here. "I'm not worried," I explained to him. "I feel protected."

In an oddly quiet voice that seemed to come from a sudden understanding, he nearly whispered, "I believe you are." I believe I am, too. Were I to have had any thoughts to the contrary, the day that Lizzie and I escaped from being stalked by three stone 20-somethings would have put those thoughts to rest.

Contemplation: That is far as I can go with you this Monday morning. I now retire to private prayer, repenting for the to many times recently that I have skipped my daily walk because I was too busy, to thank God for always being with me even when I am not with Him and for protecting from all that would harm me, to praise God for His faithfulness as do so many of the psalms leading up to Psalm 121, and to ask Him to protect all my friends and acquaintances and those of His children whom I do not know in the same wonderful way He has protected me. Then I will move on to contemplation, my favorite part of the day, letting God take over the direction in which my relationship with Him moves.

I will leave you now to your prayer and contemplation. First, though, I would like to bring to your attention a Monday morning prayer post that you might enjoy:

Fr. Austin Fleming, priest of the Archdiocese of Boston and pastor in Concord, Massachusetts, posts a prayer each Monday morning that he calls "Monday Morning Offering." I enjoy his prayers very much. I hope you also will find them inspirational. He has graciously given me permission to include a link to his blog on my Monday Morning Meditation posts. (During the week, he also posts great homilies and other thoughtful discussions. I enjoy reading those, too.)


For additional inspiration throughout the week, I would point out two sets of blogs: (1) the list of devotional blogs on my sidebar and (2) my blogroll, where I am following a number of inspirational priests and writers about spiritual matters. I learn so very much from all these people. I highly recommend them to you.

Monday Morning Meditation #71: Let Us Go Up to the Mountain of the Lord

Many apologies for missing the posting of a MMM last week. I did not notice that the post had not gone up until later in the week as I continue with the agony of not having my computer back yet and working off an old clunker that I borrow as needed. We did get a progress report, but it was rather bleak: the techies finally figured out what happened: an unnoticed power surge fried the mother board. The fine print in my warranty says that mother boards fried by power surges are not covered, and so now I have to pay some office 3000 miles away to fix and fedex my computer. Oh well, at least I will have it back, and more engrossing of our time here is a flea battle. We are going buggy with fleas. The cold weather has forced the little biters inside, where they attacked our cats. The cats have now regained to the offensive, thanks to medicine and flea collars. Now the fleas are taking refuge on me. I am considering the possibility of picking up a large dog flea collar on the way to work today. I hope I don't get too many stares!

At any rate, I moved from flea scratching to reading. Very soon, I came across a wonderful verse, Isaiah 2: 3, which reads as follows:

“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the LORD,
to the temple of the God of Jacob.
He will teach us his ways,
so that we may walk in his paths.”

Reading: Isaiah 2: 3

Meditation: When I first came to faith, it was through the direct intercession of God, and in the early days of my walk with God, I would turn day after day to God, asking for lessons. There would always be a lesson, a difficult one. The difference between learning from a human teacher and learning from God is that God knows exactly where your threshold for learning lies, exactly what your Zone of Proximal Development (to use Vygotsky's term), exactly what you should be able to do when performing at your peak. No human teacher can push you the way God does because no human teacher knows your mind, heart, emotions, motivation, and potential skill set the way God does. So many times I have had to repeat a lesson over and over until the understanding became clearer and the skills more habituated for God put before me more than I thought I could handle, yet somehow I always did handle it, however poorly at first. In my experience as a student and, for a period of time, as a teacher myself, I have never experienced a teacher like God. I guess that is why Jesus is referred to in the New Testament as "Teacher" and why, in Isaiah 2, we are told that God will teach us how to walk in His paths.

Contemplation: That is far as I can go with you this Monday morning. I now retire to private prayer to repent for the times I have tried to avoid God's lessons, to praise God for perfect way in which He knows my every capability and thought, to thank God for His willingness to keep on teaching me when I fail time after time to learn His lessons well, and to ask God to help me become a better student of His ways. Then I will move on to contemplation, my favorite part of the day, letting God take over the direction in which my relationship with Him moves.

I will leave you now to your prayer and contemplation. First, though, I would like to bring to your attention a Monday morning prayer post that you might enjoy:

Fr. Austin Fleming, priest of the Archdiocese of Boston and pastor in Concord, Massachusetts, posts a prayer each Monday morning that he calls "Monday Morning Offering." I enjoy his prayers very much. I think you also will find them inspirational. He has graciously given me permission to include a link to his blog on my Monday Morning Meditation posts. (During the week, he also posts great homilies and other thoughtful discussions. I enjoy reading those, too, as do readers of this blog who have taken the stroll over to his blog.)

For additional inspiration throughout the week, I would point out two sets of blogs: (1) the list of devotional blogs on my sidebar and (2) my blogroll, where I am following a number of inspirational priests and writers about spiritual matters. I learn so very much from all these people. I highly recommend them to you.

Monday Morning Meditation #83: God Sends Us Angels

Having finished the Book of Jeremiah, I decided rather than continuing forward in the King James Bible, I would go back and pick up those books in the Catholic Bible which are not in the King James. I know them less well, and I find them intriguing. This week I began the book of Tobit, another interesting individual, like Jeremiah, from whom we can all learn. To me, so far into the chapters, it is not clear whether Tobit is a historical figure or the hero of a religious tale (novel/novella). I believe most scholars would label Tobit the latter. (For making such determinations of Biblical genre, I have found very helpful a book by a leader of religious education, Margaret Nutting Ralph: And God Said What?)

I find the writing very synoptic. Whole stories are expressed by just 1-2 sentences. Yet, one knows that much transpired and wishes to know the ins and outs of what happened, as well as the emotions associated with the happenings. Oh, well, one has to take the tale as the author presents it.

Because of this synoptic approach, every verse is rich and full and leads one to reflection. The two verses that pulled me into reflection this week were:

16 At that very time, the prayer of these two suppliants was heard in the glorious presence of Almighty God.

17 So Raphael was sent to heal them both: to remove the cataracts from Tobit's eyes, so that he might again see God's sunlight; and to marry Raguel's daughter Sarah to Tobit's son Tobiah, and then drive the wicked demon Asmodeus from her. For Tobiah had the right to claim her before any other who might wish to marry her.In the very moment that Tobit returned from the courtyard to his house, Raguel's daughter Sarah came downstairs from her room.

Reading: Tobit 3: 16-17.
Meditation: I believe in the power of prayer. I have seen it in the lives of those around me, and I have felt it in my own life. Like Tobit and Sarah, there have been times when an angel has been sent to help. I have written about these times before in this blog, but, reading these verses this morning, I cannot help but once again think about those instances. The easiest way to share them with readers who have not read about them earlier or who have forgotten them is to provide the links.

(1) Twice, God sent me a special being to help. Once, I was in agony with a urine infection and hours from any kind of medical help. I prayed only for an increase in my normally high threshold of pain. Instead, God sent me warm hands that took away not only the pain but also the infection and gave me two hours of sleep in all that remained of the night that totally refreshed me. Another time, I had fallen and torn the rotator cuff of my right arm. I did not ask for help, other than to make the right medical decisions, but God sent help, anyway. A touch on my arm during Mass completely healed the injury -- and spooked the orthopedic surgeon. The link is here: Healings.

(2) My daughter, Lizzie, never asked for help, either, but God sent her an angel, anyway. In this case, the angel was a construction worker -- who did not exist. I related the facts as a story in a collection of tales from the Middle East (I was living there at the time). Everything before the dotted line is fact; the ending (after the dotted line) was added for narrative effect. The link is here: The Merging.

Contemplation: That is far as I can go with you this Monday morning. I now retire to private prayer to thank God again for the angels that have been sent to us and the kind help that we have received -- not always in the way we envisioned and not always as a result of our asking but of our need. I will promise God to do everything to make myself worthy of such love although I know that God's love is freely given and there is nothing I can do to earn it; all I can really do is live as God would have me live, to make my life a love song to God. Then I will move on to contemplation, my favorite part of the day, letting God take over the direction in which my relationship with Him moves.

I will leave you now to your prayer and contemplation. First, though, I would like to bring to your attention a Monday morning prayer post that you might enjoy:

Fr. Austin Fleming, priest of the Archdiocese of Boston and pastor in Concord, Massachusetts, posts a prayer each Monday morning that he calls "Monday Morning Offering." I enjoy his prayers very much. I think you also will find them inspirational. He has graciously given me permission to include a link to his blog on my Monday Morning Meditation posts. (During the week, he also posts great homilies and other thoughtful discussions. I enjoy reading those, too, as do readers of this blog who have taken the stroll over to his blog.)

For additional inspiration throughout the week, I would point out two sets of blogs: (1) the list of devotional blogs on my sidebar and (2) my blogroll, where I am following a number of inspirational priests and writers about spiritual matters. I learn so very much from all these people. I highly recommend them to you.

Monday Morning Meditation #96: On Being Good Caretakers

I am very, very happy to be back home from Madrid. While I had good job-related accomplishments there and enjoyed seeing three different cities -- Madrid, Toleda, and Alcala, stolen credit card numbers (not sure from which merchant because that information is held confidential) plagued me. Fortunately, Master Card International was on top of it all, and only one of the numbers had been used; that was a purchase that the card company declined because they had the card being used in Texas and Madrid on the same day! Smart card company -- although they thought Madrid was the fraudulent use when it really was Texas.

Well, back to the task at hand, I have continued on in Ezekiel, but not far. The verse that caught my eye, Ezekiel 36:5, is probably one that seems odd and not very full of meaning. However, if you put it into a larger context, there is considerable meaning. Here is the verse:

"This is what the Sovereign LORD says: In my burning zeal I have spoken against the rest of the nations, and against all Edom, for with glee and with malice in their hearts they made my land their own possession so that they might plunder its pastureland."

Reading: Ezekial 36:5
Meditation: It seems to me that the message that can be gleaned from this passage is so simple as to be profound. The land we live on is not ours; it is God's for the giving and the taking. If we live on it, we should take care of it, and we should share it.

Last February, we bought a house. it seemed to fall into our hands. We had not planned to buy a house, but our landlord decided to sell the one we were living in and asked us if we wanted to buy it. We learned the price, and while fair, our thought was that if we were going to buy a house, we should look for one a little larger. The rental was a two-bedroom in a historic district. Since Donnie used one bedroom for an office, guests had to sleep on our couch. If we bought this particular house, we could not modify it because it was historic. So, we looked for 3-bedroom houses in the same price range.

That is when in our very first gander at Internet listings, we saw the house we bought. In fact, it was the only house we looked at. It had five (!) bedroooms, sat on top of a hill overlooking town and yet within walking distance of the mission and downtown, and had been recently remodeled -- all for the same price as the two-bedroom house we had been renting. Not planning to buy, we had not saved up a down payment. No problem. I had a 30-year-old VA loan that had never been used, and those do not require down payments. Further, when I looked in the files, which have been moved from hither to yon over the last 30 years, the eligibility certificate was right on top! It seemed that this house was to be ours.

I have been very aware since moving here that this house is God's as much as mine, and the doors are always open to all. We have had been events here, beginning with the house blessing which was open to all in town. At that event, someone told me that this used to be a million-dollar house (I can see that), and that no one was invited to visit. Well, we have changed all that. We have a guest room for out of towners, prayer group movie nights meet here, and others who want to come, just do so. We are not owners; we are just God's caretakers for the time that we are allowed to be here.

Contemplation: That is far as I can go with you this Monday morning. I now retire to private prayer to praise God His great kindness in giving us, His tenants, a great land to live on. I will thank God for the latitude we are given to take care of His property. I will ask God to remind me of my "proper" role should I ever think that I, not God, am the owner of anything. Then I will move on to contemplation, my favorite part of the day, letting God take over the direction in which my relationship with Him moves.

I will leave you now to your prayer and contemplation. First, though, I would like to bring to your attention a Monday morning prayer post that you might enjoy:

Fr. Austin Fleming, priest of the Archdiocese of Boston and pastor in Concord, Massachusetts, posts a prayer each Monday morning that he calls "Monday Morning Offering." I enjoy his prayers very much. I think you also will find them inspirational. He has graciously given me permission to include a link to his blog on my Monday Morning Meditation posts. (During the week, he also posts great homilies and other thoughtful discussions. I enjoy reading those, too, as do readers of this blog who have taken the stroll over to his blog.)

For additional inspiration throughout the week, I would point out two sets of blogs: (1) the list of devotional blogs on my sidebar and (2) my blogroll, where I am following a number of inspirational priests and writers about spiritual matters. I learn so very much from all these people. I highly recommend them to you.

Monday Morning Meditation #95: Let Us Not Gloat

I am not certain, sitting here in Madrid, Spain, when Monday Morning will hit the rest of the world. I just know that is already upon me albeit the wee hours of the morning. Nights last long here. After an evening Mass, with yet a later one to come in the little church with the intensive Mass schedule across from the hotel where I am staying (Hotel Husa Princesa), a colleague and I went to dinner. By the time we made it back it was already midnight, but little had shut down -- just the normal Sunday closures had taken effect. So, I guess if I attend tomorrow night's Mass also, it will still be morning in the US. Since my body does an immediate adjustment when I travel, I always feel the local time and am confused about the time back home unlike most of my colleagues who experience the opposite phenomenon.

Well, down to the nitty-gritty, I am continuing on in Ezekiel even while in Spain. It keeps me current with my Bible Study group while away since Ezekiel is the book of study this fall. The verse that caught my eye and got me thinking this week was Ezekiel 35:15:

Because you rejoiced when the inheritance of Israel became desolate, that is how I will treat you. You will be desolate, Mount Seir, you and all of Edom. Then they will know that I am the LORD.

Reading: Ezekiel 35:15.

Meditation: I have had occasion to watch others gloat over someone's hard luck, especially if it is someone whom they dislike or envy. Where else did the expression, "it serves him [her] right," come from if not from rejoicing over someone else's desolation. I know occasionally when I see someone who has caused me difficulties fall into difficulties of their own, I am tempted to say, "hah, it serves him [her] right," but I do know that we are not the ones to judge what another deserves. (Just think about we each deserve -- I think I would prefer grace to getting what I really deserve.) And I recall God telling me that my abusive mother "lives in grace," which initially angered me in what I perceived as its unfairness until I realized that grace is God's to give and not mine to decide who deserves it. (Sort of reminds one of the workers who started to work in the last hours of the harvest but got paid the same as the others.)So, now, I really try, when I see someone who "got what they deserved," to ask him/her how I can help with the current difficulty. Often, I can, and when I do, I feel a whole lot better seeing someone in better shape than I would feel from gloating about someone in bad shape.

Contemplation: That is far as I can go with you this Monday morning. I now retire to private prayer to praise God for the examples given to us in the New Testament of how to think about situations of fairness. I will thank God for the latitude we are given to react in ways that help both us and those in trouble grow in compassion and gratitude. I will ask to remind me of Divine mercy when I am tempted to take the path of the gloating sinner, and I will repent any times I have done so. Then I will move on to contemplation, my favorite part of the day, letting God take over the direction in which my relationship with Him moves.

I will leave you now to your prayer and contemplation. First, though, I would like to bring to your attention a Monday morning prayer post that you might enjoy:

Fr. Austin Fleming, priest of the Archdiocese of Boston and pastor in Concord, Massachusetts, posts a prayer each Monday morning that he calls "Monday Morning Offering." I enjoy his prayers very much. I think you also will find them inspirational. He has graciously given me permission to include a link to his blog on my Monday Morning Meditation posts. (During the week, he also posts great homilies and other thoughtful discussions. I enjoy reading those, too, as do readers of this blog who have taken the stroll over to his blog.)

For additional inspiration throughout the week, I would point out two sets of blogs: (1) the list of devotional blogs on my sidebar and (2) my blogroll, where I am following a number of inspirational priests and writers about spiritual matters. I learn so very much from all these people. I highly recommend them to you.

Monday Morning Meditation #94: The Lord As Israel's Shepherd

Donnie and I have returned from a week's peaceful vacation at the Franciscan Guest House at St. Anthony's Monastery. I had plans of writing a post a day, but somehow that never materialized. Between visiting family and childhood friends living in the environs of Kennebunkport, Maine and spending time at Mass and on the grounds of the monastery, I found little time for more than contemplation -- or, perhaps, it would be more realistic to say that I spent a week being lazy with God.

Arriving home this weekend, I continued to dig into Ezekiel . There were many verses that caught my eye and could have served as food for thought (well, actually, they did). However, it was not until I reached chapter 34 that the words seized me, requiring that I share them with you. In chapter 34, God declares that He himself will become the shepherd for Israel, other shepherds having failed in the task.

Reading: Ezekiel 34.

Meditation: These words rang home sharply because yesterday I withdrew from the Secular Franciscan Order. It was not an easy decision and had a little to do with evil influences infiltrating our chapter and region, and I have blogged about this in detail before, perhaps ad nauseam as I was discerning whether to stay (see Goliath). After much prayer (probably better described as nagging God), I finally got an answer, but not the one I expected. The answer was that I was to leave -- immediately. It was a sudden change and took more than a few people, including me, by surprise. I cite below the contents of the letter I shared with the members of the SFO in my parting (note the quite coincidental use of the verb shepherding and the concept of God as shepherd, or primary teacher, validated only after the fact when I read Ezekiel 34 this morning. The letter is a bit long for a post, but, I believe, is self-explanatory, so I shall include the whole thing. (The purpose, or task, referred to is the one described in the posts on Goliath.

Dear SFO Members:

It is with mixed feelings that I bid you adieu for the decision has not been made by personal desire but through obedient volition. I am pleased that God has allowed me to be with you as you have journeyed into the Franciscan way of life although I personally have not been on a journey but rather have been developing intimacy with God in a dimension where I am learning that we travel farthest when we do not move at all. God had a purpose in directing that my life intersect yours, and I have been extraordinarily blessed to know that purpose and to know you. My being here was never about me nor was it about my becoming Franciscan for I do not relate to God nor God to me in the way the SFO formation program dictates. Nonetheless, I will continue to share devotion to poverty, charity, obedience, and joy, which took root in my soul long before I knew about a saint called Francis. I am now being shepherded into another realm of God’s kingdom, not unlike what happened with Habakkuk: Divinely picked up by the hair and set down someplace else.

I have chosen continued submission to the will of God, Who gives us times to pray in groups and times to pray alone, times to offer formulaic prayer and times to listen in silence, times to affiliate and times to question affiliations. God calls us to communion in ways beyond our understanding but not always beyond our knowing. “Be with Me” is the call I received. God did not say “study,” “formate,” “grow,” “journey,” or “join.” God said “be.” I don’t know what “being” entails; God will reveal what I need to know as I need to know it. I do know that this is a time for me to become uneducated, put aside the desire for human knowledge, and, abandoning myself to divine wisdom, let God be my teacher.

Among the many graces God has accorded this unworthy servant has been the opportunity to associate with the SFO for the past four years. I am grateful that many of you will remain in my life through other worship communities for I love all of you. Many of you have also loved me. Some of you have tolerated me. A few of you have shown me unusual mercy. I honor each of you as a tender part of God’s great creation. May God grant you the peace in your acceptance of the Franciscan Rule that I have felt in accepting God’s invitation to “be.”

Yours in prayer and peace,
Beth

Contemplation: That is far as I can go with you this Monday morning. I now retire to private prayer to thank God for bringing this particular period of discernment to a clear close. I will praise God for the variability He allows us in our worship. I will ask God for greater clarification of the next steps (if any) to be taken and will try to temper my impatience while waiting for that clarification, and I will repent any ways in which I failed God in the SFO-related tasking He gave me two years ago as well as any inadvertent hurt I inflicted on any individuals while carrying out that tasking. Then I will move on to contemplation, my favorite part of the day, letting God take over the direction in which my relationship with Him moves.

I will leave you now to your prayer and contemplation. First, though, I would like to bring to your attention a Monday morning prayer post that you might enjoy:

Fr. Austin Fleming, priest of the Archdiocese of Boston and pastor in Concord, Massachusetts, posts a prayer each Monday morning that he calls "Monday Morning Offering." I enjoy his prayers very much. I think you also will find them inspirational. He has graciously given me permission to include a link to his blog on my Monday Morning Meditation posts. (During the week, he also posts great homilies and other thoughtful discussions. I enjoy reading those, too, as do readers of this blog who have taken the stroll over to his blog.)

For additional inspiration throughout the week, I would point out two sets of blogs: (1) the list of devotional blogs on my sidebar and (2) my blogroll, where I am following a number of inspirational priests and writers about spiritual matters. I learn so very much from all these people. I highly recommend them to you.

Monday Morning Meditation #104: The Need for Gratitude

During this week, I moved on from Daniel to Hosea. Both of the first two books focus on God's great disappointment with the people of Israel, especially in their unwillingness to show any gratitude for what they have been given (food, drink, clothing) or to notice from Whom it came -- and also in their once again turning away from God to the worship of the false god, Baal.

Reading: Hosea 2:13

Meditation: We all know that an attitude of ingratitude does not pertain only to ancient Israel. It seems to be a perverse part of human nature. Even if we generally move through life with an attitude of gratitude for all the good things that God gives, we tend to feel and show less gratitude to the things that one might not be quick to label "good." For example, when my kids -- and then my grandkids -- were born with life-challenging and life-impairing birth defects, the last thing I wanted to say at the time was "Thank You, God, for these challenges." Yet, is it not the challenges we meet in life, whether it is birth defects, some obstructions at work, financial difficulties, personal health issues, or thwarted desires, that are the greatest gift? From the challenges, we learn. From the challenges, we draw closer to God and to each other because we need each other in order to cope with and overcome them. Perhaps the next time something "bad" happens to us, we should respond with the words, "Thank You, God, for trusting me with this experience," and then trust God to help us through it and to help us to gain from it.

Contemplation: That is far as I can go with you this Monday morning. I now retire to private prayer to praise God for His greater understanding of just what a "gift" is and to thank Him for trusting me with many challenges throughout my life -- and helping me with them. I will ask forgiveness for those times that I have not responded to those gifts with the appropriate gratitude. I will also ask God to continue to build my trust in Him to lead me to and through any challenge. Then I will move on to contemplation, my favorite part of the day, letting God take over the direction in which my relationship with Him moves.

I will leave you now to your prayer and contemplation. First, though, I would like to bring to your attention a Monday morning prayer post that you might enjoy:

Fr. Austin Fleming, priest of the Archdiocese of Boston and pastor in Concord, Massachusetts, posts a prayer each Monday morning that he calls "Monday Morning Offering." I enjoy his prayers very much. I think you also will find them inspirational. He has graciously given me permission to include a link to his blog on my Monday Morning Meditation posts. (During the week, he also posts great homilies and other thoughtful discussions. I enjoy reading those, too, as do readers of this blog who have taken the stroll over to his blog.)

For additional inspiration throughout the week, I would point out two sets of blogs: (1) the list of devotional blogs on my sidebar and (2) my blogroll, where I am following a number of inspirational priests and writers about spiritual matters. I learn so very much from all these people. I highly recommend them to you.

Monday Morning Meditation #53: What Is Man That God Should Be Mindful of Him?

This week I began to read the Psalms. What joy! I love the Psalms! Is there anyone who does not? The first few psalms were ones of anguish, with David being pursued by enemies and asking for God to help and protect him. Then, in Psalm 8, David gives praise to the Lord, and after that, he asks a very interesting question, "What is man that You are mindful of him?" Indeed, what is man that God is mindful of him?

Reading: Psalm 8

Meditation: In recent days, I have been blogging a bit about humility. This probably comes in great part from discussions on humility I have been having at work with employees whom I mentor and whose lack of humility is getting in the way of their promotability. Hubris wins no friends and builds no teams. Yes, there are hubristic managers -- and hubristic employees, but the pride is false, built on a crumbling foundation of overblown self-perception. Those who stand on that "unfoundation" are more likely than not to fall.

So where does the need to put ourselves first come from? Why do we want to be the first in line? Why do we want to rise to the top at the office or in our profession? Why must our children be better than our friends' children? Why do we become defensive when someone criticizes us? And where does our relationship with God fit in all of this jockeying for position? Who, indeed, are we that God should be mindful of us?

He has given us two great commandments: love Him and love each other. Neither gives us a basis or need for pushing ourselves past others. We don't have to earn God's love; we already have it. We don't have to prove ourselves in order to receive God's grace; He gives it without our even asking for it.

God exhorts us to be humble, to be meek, to put others first. He gave us an extraordinary example: Himself. (I highly recommend Ilia Delio's book, The Humility of God.) While the possibility of our emulating His example at any deep level is highly unlikely, the possibility of His leading us to the level of humility of which we are capable is very likely -- if only we allow Him to take over and eliminate the unholy parts of our ego.

Contemplation: That is far as I can go with you this Monday morning. I must retire to private prayer to thank God for being mindful of us, to praise Him for His wonderful and unemulatable example of humility, to repent for any time that pride has tained my relations, especially my relationship with Him, and to ask Him to peel off all my layers of pride and leave my ego bare, devoid of any build-up to to deter my ability to be a good servant to my colleagues, my employees, my family, my friends, and God. Then I will spend as much time as I can in contemplation, my favorite part of the day, letting God take over the direction in which my relationship with Him moves, knowing that I could have no better Protector.

I will leave you to your prayer and contemplation. First, though, I would like to bring to your attention a Monday morning prayer post that you might enjoy:

Fr. Austin Fleming, priest of the Archdiocese of Boston and pastor in Concord, Massachusetts, posts a prayer each Monday morning that he calls "Monday Morning Offering." I enjoy his prayers very much. I hope you also will find them inspirational. He has graciously given me permission to include a link to his blog on my Monday Morning Meditation posts. (During the week, he also posts great homilies and other thoughtful discussions. I enjoy reading those, too.)

For additional inspiration throughout the week, I would point out two sets of blogs: (1) the list of devotional blogs on my sidebar and (2) my blogroll, where I am following a number of inspirational priests and writers about spiritual matters. I learn so very much from all these people. I highly recommend them to you.

Monday Morning Meditation #54: Praise the Lord

This week I made it as far as the next psalm, Psalm 9. At this rate, it will take me a couple of years to make it through the Psalms. Actually, that does not seem to be a problem at all. Each psalm is so rich that a week to consider it is well within reason. I am really enjoying the opportunity to work my way through the Psalms. Psalm 9 turns away from the themes of the first eight psalms and turns toward praising God -- for an entire litany of things: protection against enemies, support, righteous judgment & justice, wonders, help, succor for the oppressed, never being forsaken, and "a stronghold in times of trouble," among others.

Reading: Psalm 9

Meditation: Reading through David's list of reasons to praise God makes one realize how little the world has changed in all this passage of an incredible number of years and centuries. We still look to God for help in time of trouble, and He does not forsake us. We still need Him to protect us against our enemies, and He does not fail us. We still look to Him for justice and righteous judgment, and He does not disappoint us. We still look for Him for succor when we are oppressed, and He does not deny us a deep emotional relief. And still today we wonder at His wonders. How often, though, do we remember to praise Him for all these things?

I have upon occasion noticed in our prayer group that we tend to have an imbalance in our prayer mixture. Prayers of petition come easily; oh, we have quite a list of petitions. We actually do not do too poorly at identifying our own failings, regrets, and things for which we truly repent. We have, over the few years we have been together, seen wonders in the ways in which prayers have been answered, people have been helped, and even life-threatening medical (and financial) problems have been overcome -- and for these, it has been easy to express our gratitude. When it comes to praise, however, we sometimes forget and sometimes simply lack the words. I don't know why that is, but in talking to others, I realize that we are not alone. We need David's enthusiasm in praising God for everything that David lists and more and more and more. We need David's words and more words. I wonder if David felt at times that he did not have all the words he needed to express the kinds of praise God deserves to hear from us. Praise the Lord! We say it so often in passing to each other. Maybe we need to say it more often to God.

Contemplation: That is far as I can go with you this Monday morning. I must retire to private prayer and this week, this time, I believe I shall spend it entirely in praising God, praising that is overdue. Then I will spend as much time as I can in contemplation, my favorite part of the day, letting God take over the direction in which my relationship with Him moves, something for which I should -- and will -- express greater gratitude and praise.

I will leave you to your prayer and contemplation. First, though, I would like to bring to your attention a Monday morning prayer post that you might enjoy:

Fr. Austin Fleming, priest of the Archdiocese of Boston and pastor in Concord, Massachusetts, posts a prayer each Monday morning that he calls "Monday Morning Offering." I enjoy his prayers very much. I hope you also will find them inspirational. He has graciously given me permission to include a link to his blog on my Monday Morning Meditation posts. (During the week, he also posts great homilies and other thoughtful discussions. I enjoy reading those, too.)

For additional inspiration throughout the week, I would point out two sets of blogs: (1) the list of devotional blogs on my sidebar and (2) my blogroll, where I am following a number of inspirational priests and writers about spiritual matters. I learn so very much from all these people. I highly recommend them to you.

Monday Morning Meditation #103: On Not Understanding

I have now finished the Book of Daniel. Amazing, the number of visions and dreams he had and moreover was able to interpret. I rarely remember any of my dreams, and when I do, they seem to be pure nonsense. (I suppose Freud might have some idea about how to interpret them -- whether correctly or incorrectly would be another story.) One might envy Daniel's ability at dream interpretation, but then one must consider that Daniel had some divine help. Therefore, I found some great relief when I read verse 8 of the last chapter (chapter 12) of Daniel: "I heard but I did not understand."

Reading: Daniel 12:8
Meditation: When I first came to faith, I wanted to know everything. I tracked down books on apologetics, the catechism of the church, the mystics, and anything else that would explain "everything" to me. It took me some time before I understood that there is much that I cannot understand, will not understand, and should not understand. Accepting not understanding was one of the hardest things ever for me to do because I am a scholar by nature. Initially, I resisted the thought that grace alone is enough, faith alone is enough, trust alone is enough, and that knowing why is not essential. Over time, I have become more comfortable with not knowing. It is like a child's seesaw: as one side goes up, the other comes down, as trust in God goes up, the need to know everything comes down. Being grounded in not knowing I now understand to be a good thing.

Contemplation: That is far as I can go with you this Monday morning. I now retire to private prayer to praise God for His grace and to thank Him for teaching me how to trust without understanding. I will ask forgiveness for those times that I have resisted not knowing and insisted on an answer "why" -- which I did not get, anyway (and should not have). I will also ask God to continue to build my trust and my willingness to accept without knowing; somehow I think God likes to honor those kinds of requests. Then I will move on to contemplation, my favorite part of the day, letting God take over the direction in which my relationship with Him moves.

I will leave you now to your prayer and contemplation. First, though, I would like to bring to your attention a Monday morning prayer post that you might enjoy:

Fr. Austin Fleming, priest of the Archdiocese of Boston and pastor in Concord, Massachusetts, posts a prayer each Monday morning that he calls "Monday Morning Offering." I enjoy his prayers very much. I think you also will find them inspirational. He has graciously given me permission to include a link to his blog on my Monday Morning Meditation posts. (During the week, he also posts great homilies and other thoughtful discussions. I enjoy reading those, too, as do readers of this blog who have taken the stroll over to his blog.)

For additional inspiration throughout the week, I would point out two sets of blogs: (1) the list of devotional blogs on my sidebar and (2) my blogroll, where I am following a number of inspirational priests and writers about spiritual matters. I learn so very much from all these people. I highly recommend them to you.

Monday Morning Meditation #101: Not By Our Hand

Reading through the book of Daniel, I simply had to stop at the powerful dream that Nebuchadnezzar had. Personally, I never remember my dreams, but I do doubt that any of them have been prophetic ones although I do know that God, over the centuries, has communicated with people through dreams (seemingly far more often than through locutions, which is my more common, although rare, experience). So it is even more fascinating for me to read about a dream as highly prophetic -- and initially difficult to understand -- as Nebuchadnezzar's. Here is the dream, as reported to Daniel by King Nebuchadnezzar:

"I looked, and there before me stood a tree in the middle of the land. Its height was enormous. The tree grew large and strong and its top touched the sky; it was visible to the ends of the earth. 12 Its leaves were beautiful, its fruit abundant, and on it was food for all. Under it the wild animals found shelter, and the birds lived in its branches; from it every creature was fed.

In the visions I saw while lying in bed, I looked, and there before me was a holy one, a messenger,coming down from heaven. He called in a loud voice: ‘Cut down the tree and trim off its branches; strip off its leaves and scatter its fruit. Let the animals flee from under it and the birds from its branches. But let the stump and its roots, bound with iron and bronze, remain in the ground, in the grass of the field. Let him be drenched with the dew of heaven, and let him live with the animals among the plants of the earth. 16 Let his mind be changed from that of a man and let him be given the mind of an animal, till seven times pass by for him.

The decision is announced by messengers, the holy ones declare the verdict, so that the living may know that the Most High is sovereign over all kingdoms on earth and gives them to anyone he wishes and sets over them the lowliest of people."

Reading on, one finds Daniel's interpretation of this dream. King Nebuchadnezzar was the tree. He had become powerful. More important (or more distressing), he had become proud that his kingdom extended so far in all directions, and he did not glorify God adequately for this but held some of the praise within for himself. So, God's plan was to humble him by sending him out into the fields to live with the wild animals like an animal until such time that his pride was relinquished and he knew the overwhelming power of the Lord.

And this is precisely what befell Nebuchadnezzar. He found himself living among the animals until he had been humbled, after which his royal entourage found him and returned him to his throne, a humbled and grateful man.

Reading: Daniel 4

Meditation: This dream of Nebuchadnezzar hit home for me. I have often felt -- and said -- that it is difficult to integrate worldly success with spiritual humility. Possible with the help of God, yes, but, oh, so difficult because it is so tempting to assume that one is a "self-made person" and that one can go it alone. After all, in American society, at least, we encourage people to move up the ladder, so to speak, and we praise self-made people. Being motivated by the rung of the ladder and the praise of men, however, take us far from those fields of wild animals where God would have us understand who is great and who is small, who is important and who is not, who is to be glorified and who is to do the glorifying.

On a daily basis, this is brought home to me. As a very senior manager, even though I am in a position where God intended me to be, I have moments of assuming that I can personally make decisions -- and, my goodness, those decisions are almost always flawed in some way, or if not flawed, then not nearly as insightful and good as they could be. On the other hand, when I do take these to God in prayer before jumping to some human conclusion and when I do give credit to its rightful Belonger, that is, when I do realize who is in charge and how little I personally contribute, then things work out amazingly well, better than anything I could possible plan or enact.

Some time ago, I wrote a couple of posts about the price of success and how my division would be dismantled in two years, with me reporting to a new person brought in as a layer between me and the highest level of management to whom I now report. With God's help, I had put aside all concern about that plan, not without great effort at subduing the pride that said, "hey, I created this success, let me have it; don't pass it along to someone who did nothing for it." God showed me, though, that this was not the right attitude, and with some help from God -- an evening walk here and there, a prayer now and then, I was able to reconcile myself to reality and eventuality. However, over the next two years, things have changed, and the plan has been scrapped. So, too, has been my undue pride. So, while the threatened intermediary never showed up to change my status in the human world, God changed it in the spiritual world. I have found that I like it better that way -- and if some intermediary ever does show up (looks pretty doubtful given the current economic climate), it won't matter because anything I have created was with the help of God, supervisors and employees. I would very much hesitate now to take credit for any of it. I prefer instead to join Nebuchadnezzar in glorifying God.

Contemplation: That is far as I can go with you this Monday morning. I now retire to private prayer to praise God for all the reasons I have to glorify Him. I will thank God for His lessons, and I will ask forgiveness for those times that I have been slow to learn them. I will also ask God to continue to give me those lessons in humility that I so much need. Then I will move on to contemplation, my favorite part of the day, letting God take over the direction in which my relationship with Him moves.

I will leave you now to your prayer and contemplation. First, though, I would like to bring to your attention a Monday morning prayer post that you might enjoy:

Fr. Austin Fleming, priest of the Archdiocese of Boston and pastor in Concord, Massachusetts, posts a prayer each Monday morning that he calls "Monday Morning Offering." I enjoy his prayers very much. I think you also will find them inspirational. He has graciously given me permission to include a link to his blog on my Monday Morning Meditation posts. (During the week, he also posts great homilies and other thoughtful discussions. I enjoy reading those, too, as do readers of this blog who have taken the stroll over to his blog.)

For additional inspiration throughout the week, I would point out two sets of blogs: (1) the list of devotional blogs on my sidebar and (2) my blogroll, where I am following a number of inspirational priests and writers about spiritual matters. I learn so very much from all these people. I highly recommend them to you.

Monday Morning Meditation #100: The Value of Vegetables

Oh, my goodness! As I typed in the title for this post, I realized that it is #100, exactly. It seems pretty amazing that 100 weeks have passed since I have begun writing this column. It is especially amazing because I still have only scratched the surface of all the wonderful information, stories, advice, guidance, direction, etc., that one finds in the Bible. I do apologize for the late posting of this MMM. It is no longer morning. Doah stayed overnight last night, and his hyperactivity kept my attention riveted to matters that do not require quiet concentration.

Now, back to this week's reading. Having completed Ezekiel, last week, I moved on to Daniel. Not that I worked very far through that book...I stopped on the very first chapter on the story of Daniel and his friends choosing to be fed vegetables and water over the royal food and wine offered to them and ended up healthier than their peers at the royal table.

Reading: Daniel 1
Meditation: One could read this story from a literal point of view or from a metaphorical point of view. I read it from both.http://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gif

Likely in the days of Daniel, medicine was not advanced enoughttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gifh to know the value of fruits and vegetables over red meat and more popular foods. So, it is interesting to read that somehow Daniel trusted to plain food associated with a simple life. Today we would not be surprised to find that as a result Daniel and his companions were healthier than those who opted for the foods that were high in fat and cholesterol.

Similarly, one might look at a "simple" life versus a "royal" life. While riches (like royal food) might be "tasty" (attractive), they are not spiritually healthy for us -- as we are frequently told throughout the Bible, especially by Jesus in the gospels; simplicity and poverty (like vegetables), as those who have followed in the path of St. Francis and others like him have learned, are healthier.

So, I guess the take-away is what our mothers have always told us. We need to eat our vegetables!

Contemplation: That is far as I can go with you this Monday morning. I now retire to private prayer to praise God for demonstrating to us and telling us in so many ways throughout history that we should concentrate on eating our vegetables and not on the fancier fare of life. I will thank God for giving us vegetables, and I will ask forgiveness for those times that I have bypassed the vegetables and reached for the cordon bleu. I will also ask God to continue to guide me in the decisions I have to make on a daily basis on how simple or complex I make my life. Then I will move on to contemplation, my favorite part of the day, letting God take over the direction in which my relationship with Him moves.

I will leave you now to your prayer and contemplation. First, though, I would like to bring to your attention a Monday morning prayer post that you might enjoy:

Fr. Austin Fleming, priest of the Archdiocese of Boston and pastor in Concord, Massachusetts, posts a prayer each Monday morning that he calls "Monday Morning Offering." I enjoy his prayers very much. I think you also will find them inspirational. He has graciously given me permission to include a link to his blog on my Monday Morning Meditation posts. (During the week, he also posts great homilies and other thoughtful discussions. I enjoy reading those, too, as do readers of this blog who have taken the stroll over to his blog.)

For additional inspiration throughout the week, I would point out two sets of blogs: (1) the list of devotional blogs on my sidebar and (2) my blogroll, where I am following a number of inspirational priests and writers about spiritual matters. I learn so very much from all these people. I highly recommend them to you.